


Stupid

by Macremae



Category: Wolf 359 (Radio)
Genre: Hera knows all, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-23
Updated: 2015-12-23
Packaged: 2018-05-08 19:10:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 844
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5509724
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Macremae/pseuds/Macremae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>"Does not matter anyway." he shot back, "Things were made irreparable long time ago."</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>"And yet you continue to do one of the many 'human' things you love to condemn: hope for the impossible. For someone who thinks emotions are unnecessary and foolish, you certainly have a lot of them."</em>
</p>
<p>Eiffel is a basket case, an enigma, and the bane of Hilbert's existance all wrapped up in an unfortuantly wonderful man.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stupid

**Author's Note:**

> Based off the apparently (and most likely) amazing improv conversation Zach did for RandomDraggon at the live show

"Someone's been awfully quiet today."

Hera's voiced echoed throughout the silent lab, seemingly nonchalant. Hilbert glanced up from his microscope before turning back to it, not believing the careless tone for a moment.

"Really," she continued, "no explosions, no electrical fires, no barely contained outbreaks of lethal epidemics. Nice and peaceful all day. Did you finally decide to start following some actual lab safety procedures?"

Hilbert didn't know what game the AI wanted to play, but he wasn't in the mood. He pointedly adjusted the aperture of the microscope's lens extra loudly. 

"Now I was thinking that this might have something to do with dinner last night, but that would just be silly now wouldn't it?" 

Obviously ignoring her wouldn't be as easy as he thought. Hilbert really would rather not have relived the fiasco that was yesterday's evening meal, thank you very much, but Hera was making it rather difficult.

The reasoning behind this was mainly the Commander's fault. He had been very careful about staring longingly at Officer Eiffel up until then, but the damned woman had noticed just as he was looking away. Of course, she just had to point that out to everyone else at the table, and Hilbert had left the general vicinity of the area as fast as humanly possible. 

He had been avoiding any sort of interaction with Eiffel for the better part of the day, mainly by staying in his lab and doing nothing that might attract attention. It was excruciatingly boring, but necessary. Of course, Hilbert had failed to account for the fact that Hera didn't have a corporeal form, and thus could go anywhere she damn well pleased. 

"Gloating is unbecoming of you." he replied cooly, still refusing to look away from his work. 

"Oh it's not gloating at all. I'm just making the probably correct observation that you've gotten sloppy at hiding your feelings for Officer Eiffel."

Unable to help himself, Hilbert took the bait and glared up at the smiling projection hovering above him, who grinned harder when she saw the blush creeping up his face. 

"At least more subtle than you."

Hera laughed. "Oh no, I wouldn't get involved in romance if you paid me. That's for you humans to be stupid about."

_Stupid_ , Hilbert thought, _pretty much summed it up_.

"Does not matter anyway." he shot back, "Things were made irreparable long time ago."

"And yet you continue to do one of the many 'human' things you love to condemn: hope for the impossible. For someone who thinks emotions are unnecessary and foolish, you certainly have a lot of them."

Why in the name of sanity had he rebooted her personality functions again? 

Oh, right: Eiffel. Always Eiffel.

It was indeed deplorable how much he valued the man's happiness, how his heart leaped every time he smiled around him. The breath crushing panic he had felt when the Commander had brought him to Eiffel's limp, coughing form had felt so alien, the world had dissolved around him for a few moments. The comms officer had looked so much like Olga in that moment, Hilbert had felt as if his heart would tear itself into a bloody pulp.

They were too alike, his sister and Eiffel. Same bright, easy smile, same secretly brilliant mind filled with ridiculous ideas. Same tendency to almost get themselves killed.

Hera was right, he really was stupid.

The AI didn't respond, but looked at him curiously. "When will you learn that you're just as much of a person as the rest of us?" she asked.

"When will you all learn that I have not been human for a very long time? Lovelace plans to leave both of us on ship to die, but which of us is crew trying to save? Eiffel will never see me as anything other than monster, and is right to do so. Sad but true. He will never feel the same I feel for him, and I have accepted that."

"Then why are you trying so hard to be good again?"

Hilbert was silent for a long time. He felt a hot prickling in his eyes, and quickly blinked back tears.

"Is like you said," he eventually replied, "hope for the impossible."

Meanwhile, on the opposite side of the ship, Hera was holding a similar conversation with Eiffel.

"He just," Eiffel ranted, searching for the right words, "he makes me feel things, and I'm not even sure what those things are anymore. Like, I wouldn't pass up the chance to drop kick Hilbert out an airlock, but at the same time, I would. I mean, he saved my life, so that's something, I guess."

"You guess?"

Eiffel snorted. "Hera, if you haven't noticed, my life isn't worth all that much."

"I have, in fact, and I beg to differ, as would the other residents on this station."

"Sure Jan, sure." Eiffel said, giving the ceiling a look. "I dunno, okay? It doesn't matter no matter what, so let's just stop thinking about it.

_Humans_ , Hera thought, _could be remarkably stupid sometimes_.


End file.
